Military Families reflect on the end of the Iraq War
The nightmare continues…
From Pat Alviso and Jeff Merrick, Long Beach Ca. Parents of Marine who has been deployed 4 times
As a loving family, along with our son, who is a career Marine, we watched in horror when we invaded Afghanistan and the drumbeat for war lead into the senseless invasion and occupation of Iraq. Military families have paid dearly- over 4,000 of our loved ones are gone forever. Hundreds of thousands of innocent Iraqis dead. And it took all this time to finally get out of a war that should never have happened in the first place? People like us who are fighting for justice and against the misuse of our military are telling me they will believe it when they see it.
In our home, we take heart in the fact that our president has announced we will finally be out in December, even though this was a result of not being able to cut a deal with the Iraqi’s regarding troop accountability and that this was President Bush’s signed Status of Forces’ Agreement, not anything President Obama decided. Our son has been deployed twice to Iraq and twice to Afghanistan. He is scheduled to be re-deployed again in January. For us- and so many others- the nightmare continues.
The War Has Come to an End – for Whom?
From Susan Handle Terbay
Over 30 years ago I gave birth to a beautiful baby boy. I loved him from the moment I felt his movement inside my body and that love has never wavered. I nurtured him, taught him right from wrong. My life centered around him and his siblings.
That son went to war and returned a different son and I grieve. The military taught him how to take a life but not how to live a life after fighting in a war. The military taught him to disassociate his feelings – to become void of any feelings during a war but did not tell him how to allow feelings of love and joy to return.
The war I protested, the war that provided nothing to the world except destruction of humans from our soldiers to the innocents of the invaded country, has invaded the sanctity of my family and it never goes away. No one outside the family realizes the depth of wounds within our hearts as we watch my son’s struggles to heal and be normal in a society that praises him in one moment and completely ignores and abandons him in the next. We are his life-line and yet we are his enemy. It is a reality of so many military families of soldiers with PTSD. While my son suffers from PTSD – so too, do we as his family.
When the President stated that our soldiers were coming home from Iraq by the end of the year, I hesitantly smiled, waiting for the other shoe to drop and the conditions to be laid out. If it is true then what will our sons and daughters be coming home to in our country? Praise, of course; heroes, of course and then when all the glitter is gone what is left but a soldier and his/her family struggling to heal the wounds that forever bleed and to find laughter again when overwhelming sadness prevails deep within a soul. Society has a short memory and will turn on these young men and women if they fail to live up to our high standards of living. We used them and now we are done with them attitude has to end in this country and it is time we start to respect life of all humans.
The war is coming to an end but is it really?
When will we ever learn? Now is the time. Now let’s bring them home from Afghanistan. Now let us learn to live in peace and not have knee-jerk reactions that lead us to war and worse the loss of our young men and women – physically, mentally, spiritually and emotionally. Now is the time to be the country who leads the world in life and living in peace and not the country who leads the world in its destruction.
War destroys so much and it never, ever ends for those it consumes!
Gold Star Families reflect on the end of the Iraq War
In Our Breath and On the Wind
From Celeste Zappala, Mother of Sgt Sherwood Baker, KIA 4/26/04 Baghdad
I heard the news of the war ending late on Friday. It seemed an odd time to release such serious news, and made my family and I think that this news was being treated just as the war has been treated for years, it is inconsequential to the American public, a bad after thought not even worth a prime time news conference.
We lost our beloved son Sherwood Baker to the war that never should have happened. He died protecting those looking for WMD long after everyone knew they were not there. He never comes back, he never gets to watch his son grow up, there is no chance for correction, his life was blown out of him on April 26, 2004. We knew it was wrong when it happened, we know it is still wrong, he and the other 4478 soldiers should have never been in Iraq in the first place.
So we can rejoice that a day will come when soldiers will not be in danger in Iraq, and we can pray that all those injured in body and spirit will be offered the healing they need and deserve. Can we promise them we as a Nation will never again send them in to wars based on lies? I fear not, I fear the business of war will always require a market, and unless we are all powerfully vocal, the idea of wars of choice will perpetuate.
For me, within my soul, I will always be in the windy cemetary hearing the guns salute my boy lying in his casket on the ground in front of me; that moment is as close as my breath, as is the last moment I held him close to me.
Yes the war is over, and for some of us, it will always be in our breath and on the wind.
A Sense of the Bittersweet
From Diane and Neil Santoriello, parents of 1st Lt. Neil A. Santoriello Jr., KIA 8-13-04
We have a sense of the bittersweet. So many lives wasted. Our son was the 930th soldier to die in Iraq There have been more than 3000 deaths since his. What will be the final total? Somewhere there is an American soldier who will be the last soldier to die in Iraq. Survivoring families are scarred forever. We welcome our troops homecoming but we hope the government will give them the help and support they need. Now we need to bring our troops home from Afghanistan and use our tax dollars to do nation building at home.
Iraq…My Reactions
From Cheryl Felder-Stuart, mother of Cpt Arthur “BO” Felder, killed 4/24/04
I am Cheryl Felder-Stuart my son Cpt Arthur “BO” Felder, commander of the 39th Infantry from Arkansas was killed on April 24, 2004. I am happy and I am thrilled that no other mother will have to suffer as I have. I have had two heart surgeries and I had to take a medical retirement since my son was killed. When we told my mother her oldest grand son was killed in Iraq she died.
THANK GOD this is over.
The Iraq War is ending, but the work continues…
As military families, we rejoice when any troops come home, and we are relieved our loved ones will never again be deployed to Iraq. However, we know that the war is not really over, not for military families, not for veterans, and not for the people of Iraq. It is not over for families with loved ones who will leave Iraq only to be redeployed to Afghanistan. For the families whose loved ones never returned from Iraq, or who took their own lives, or who returned with significant physical and psychological wounds, it will never really be over.
The people of Iraq will still be faced with private U.S. military contractors and years of rebuilding their country. In Iraq, it is not just the military but the entire country that will have to deal with the physical and psychological wounds of war. To add insult to injury, Defense Secretary Leon Pannetta recently announced that 40,000 troops will stay “in the region,” meaning the U.S. could easily have troops back on the ground in Iraq at any time.
There is still a lot of work to be done, and the voices of military families are more important than ever. We must continue working for an end to the war in Afghanistan, for better treatment of our service members, and for proper care for all veterans. We must hold our government accountable and continue to speak out.
As always, we say: “Bring ALL the troops home now, and take care of them when they get here!”